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  • Writer's pictureSofi

I give what I am

We commonly hear this:"you receive what you give"...a phrase that encourage us to give everything because the more we give, the more we'll receive, right? That's the logic. However, reality often doesn't follow logic and is unfair. We don't always receive what we give and it's not because the other is bad or ungrateful, it's simply because the other thinks, hopes, feels, and acts differently; has other motivations, other values, other expectations...anyway, another personal story.


Not understanding this and acting according to the logic that I should receive according to what I give can lead us to close ourselves and to give in a conditional way; giving according to what we hope to receive. If a relationship is reciprocal, I give a lot, but if it isn't, then I don't give as much...losing its meaning, its authentic value, its essence. To some extent it's like we betray our identity, because it depends on each person, each interaction, each relationship. And we also betray the other person's essence because we're demanding that they think, feel, and act like us and that's impossible.


We won't always receive what we give just as we won't always give what we receive; it's part of this complexity that characterizes us as human beings…therefore we must think of ourselves, of what is born to us, and if we receive back good but if not, also good, for what we give speaks more about us than the other.


Sure, many times giving everything and not receiving what we expect can bring disappointment, sadness, frustrations...I think it would also be good to review what we're giving ...since sometimes we believe we're giving everything but under different types of messages.


Regardless of whether or not we receive what we give, it's worth focusing on what we receive from ourselves when we give, the peace of knowing that we gave what we are, not what we pretend to be according to X or Y person... we gave according to our essence and that's enough. Knowing that is enough, if the other recognizes it or not, it's beside the point.


 

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